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Footprints in the sand

A rice paper tale...

Name:
butterfly_highs










      
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I am not what you think I am.
I am not whom I choose.
I am whatever you have it in your head for me to be.
I am an actress playing the biggest role of my life.
I live in my own world, isolated and alone.
Terrified of the truth and scared to take a chance.
Trapped by the past and already defeated by what is yet to come.
I am overly critical and dying in my own reflection.
A pessimistic liberal yearning to be alive.
Held back by a structured element and defined by society.
Wishing my past was just a dream.
I am still lying to myself.
Wearing a mask that is priceless.
I am hesitant but hidden by the dream of perfection.
Longing for acceptance of myself.
I am persuaded by certainty.
Motivated in beginning anew.
I am a fraud.
I am just a little girl.
All wrapped up in my wall of rice paper.

I’m crying and I don’t know why
I’m lying here on this bed of white roses
And I see nothing
I’ve become a total misfortune to all that ever was
And I’m hoping
Maybe this could become a brighter day
Oh but if only I could find the switch
To turn on the light in my eyes
To turn on the way to paradise
I could become a beautiful petal
On the softest grain of sand
The oleanders shake in the morning
As dew falls down on my hand
There is no beauty in lies
But that is all I do
There is no purity in hopelessness
But that’s what I do
I’m as clean as a teardrop
And they fall on my pillowcase
I’ve felt a lot
But never quite this much
I’m not really feeling though
I’m numb and I can’t see why
My eyes are burning and I can’t see the sky
I’m lying here on this bed of white roses
And I see nothing
I’ve become a total misfortune to all that ever was
And I’m hoping…

Just a moment in this lifetime,
Just a tragedy ahead.
Not knowing where each turn will lead,
Within seconds we might be dead.
Live each day to the fullest,
Do not stop to wonder why.
Do everything your heart desires,
In dreams, reach for the sky.
Surprises at every stop sign,
With its share of wrong ways and dead-ends.
Statistics don't help you with the future,
They only tell you where you've been.
With so many people among us,
There are no certainties.
And all it takes is just one person,
To reroute history.
Don't waste one single moment,
How very precious that they are.
What seems a long way off,
Is really not that far.
-Teal Henderson

I look happy now, but can you see the inside,
The inside of a person who has cried.
I have cried a million tears, and I will cry a million more.
Because of life, my mind and soul are at war.
I don’t know whether to stand up and fight, or to lie down and die.
For all these things, my eyes…they must cry.
They must cry a lonely tear, for it will be the last one.
I must end it now, because theses fears I cannot out-run.
The fears of life, the loss of my love,
The expectations of others, I fall short of.
So this is it, this is my greatest fear.
Hold on tightly…for this is the last tear.

Written with a pen,
Sealed with a kiss.
If you love me,
Please answer this.
Do you love me?
Or do you not?
You told me once but I forgot.
So tell me now,
And tell me true.
So I can say I love you too.
Of all the people I’ve ever met,
You’re the one I’ll never forget.
And if I die before you do,
I’ll go to heaven and wait for you.
But if you’re not there on judgment day,
I’ll know you went the other way.
I’ll give the angels back their wings,
And risk the loss of everything.

Believe in yourself, in what you think, in what you feel.
Believe in the truth, in the good, in the ideal.
Believe that your dreams can someday become real…
Forever and always, Believe.
Believe in yourself and what you can do.
Believe in the goals that you strive to pursue.
Believe in the friends who believe in you too.
Forever and always, Believe.

Most people love you for who you pretend to be ... To keep their love, you keep pretending--performing. You get to love your pretense ... It's true, we're locked in an image, an act. And, the sad thing is, people get so used to their image--they grow attached to their masks. They love their chains. They forget all about who they really are. And, if you try to remind them, they hate you for it. They feel like you're trying to steal their most precious possession.
--James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors

Forget about the days when it’s been cloudy,
but don’t forget about your hours in the sun.
Forget about the mistakes you can’t change now,
but don’t forget the lessons that you’ve learned.
Forget about the misfortunes you’ve encountered,
but don’t forget the times your luck has turned.
Forget about the days you’ve been lonely,
but don’t forget about the friendly smiles you’ve seen.
Forget about the plans that didn’t seem to work out right,
but do not forget to always have a dream.

Only a child...dancing a dare.
Stripped in the moonlight,
Naked and bare.
Not on the out, but inside I scream.
Bleeding for love...
Begging to breathe.
Alone, not alone...doesn't matter which one.
No, it's not just a stage...
I’m the wounded one.
Too long it's progressed...
My dying like this.
Finally, perhaps - I will be laid to rest.
On a tombstone you'll find
My name and my eyes
Along with these words
At night I would cry.
If you held me,
If you saw me...
If you loved me,
If you wanted me...
Maybe I wouldn't be in this boarded box...
If only you would have shown me...
I'll love you forever and ever.
Here I lie...
Flying free at last.
My soul is no longer attacked.
Raise up your glass,
Shout for me now.
I can rest in peace.
I can finally lie down.
This final song to you my dear
Is one of blood, scars, and tears...
So here I end this long goodbye...
With suicide notes and butterfly highs .

I need more time to find the real me...
To fly like the birds... to be set free.
Why couldn't I stop until I had died?
It was hate for myself hidden inside.

Believe in yourself and always stand tall.
Those that have doubts are those that will fall.
Enjoy what you do and remember to smile.
It’s the hard work and effort that make it worthwhile.
Remain focused on what it is you wish to achieve.
Remember dedication, commitment, and to always believe.

In life we do things; some we wish we had never done, some we wish we could replay a million times in our heads, but they make us who we are. And in the end, those experiences shape every detail about us. If we were to reverse any of them, we wouldn't be at the exact place that we are today. So just live, make mistakes, and have wonderful times, but never EVER second guess who you are, where you have been, and most importantly, where it is that you are going.

As I live each day may I do my part
To make one difference, to touch one heart
And through each day may it be my goal
To encourage one mind and inspire one soul

Yesterday is already a dream and tomorrow is only a vision. But a day well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness and every tomorrow a vision of hope.

With each sunset comes a new dawn, as with each failure comes a new chance. Don't let your chances pass you by while you're dreaming of the sunset you will never get to see again.

I am a success today because I had a friend who believed in me and I didn't have the heart to let him down. -Abraham Lincoln

You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you’ll discover will be wonderful. What you’ll discover is yourself. -Alan Alda

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. -Dr. Seuss

Go confidently in the directions of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. - Henry David Thoreau

Each man is a hero and an oracle to somebody, and to that person whatever he says has an enhanced value. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly because life is too short to not be happy.

I have often dreamed of a far off place where a voice inside keeps saying this is where I’m meant to be.

Some people put up walls, not to keep other out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.

Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up. - Robert Frost

It's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It is the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It is the one who won't be taken who cannot seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live. -Bette Midler

The world comes to us in an endless stream of puzzle pieces that we would like to think all fit together somehow, but that in fact never do. -Robert M. Pirsig, Lila. An inquiry into morals

The only way to really live is to throw off your armor, to drop your guard, to be defenseless and non-resistant. -Simon Heighwaya

Believe, when you are most unhappy, that there is something for you to do in the world. So long as you can sweeten another's pain, life is not in vain. -Helen Keller

For all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: “It might have been.” -John Greenleaf Whittier

The journey between what you once were and who you are now becoming is where the dance of life really takes place. -Barbara De Angelis

Procrastination is the thief of time: Year after year it steals, till all are fled, and to the mercies of a moment leaves the vast concerns of an eternal scene. -Edward Young; British Poet

Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be -George Sheehan

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream. -C.S. Lewis

Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened. -Dr. Seuss

As memory may be a paradise from which we cannot be driven, it may also be a hell from which we cannot escape. -John Lancaster Spalding

The principle is competing against yourself. It's about self improvement, about being better than you were the day before. -Steve Young; Football Player

In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on. - Robert Frost

Laugh at the imperfections; love the misdirection’s 'cause happiness is realizing that it's so much easier to smile. -Andy Brommel

Always reach for the stars. Even though you may trip and fall on the moon, you’re still on higher ground then when you started. -Kathy Boone

Creativity is a whirlpool of imagination that swirls in the depths of our minds. -Robert Toth

To laugh often and love much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Being vulnerable doesn't have to be threatening. Just have the courage to be sincere, open and honest. This opens the door to deeper communication all around. It creates self-empowerment and the kind of connections with others we all want in life. Speaking from the heart frees us from the secrets that burden us. These secrets are what make us sick or fearful. Speaking truth helps you get clarity on your real heart directives. -Sara Paddison

Your life lies before you like a path of driven snow, be careful how you tread it cause every step will show.-Lowri Williams

Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness never danced in the rain.

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference. -Robert Frost

Thanks to the interstate highway system, it is now possible to travel across the country from coast to coast without seeing anything. -Charles Kuralt

There's a place in my heart that is yours alone.
A piece of my life that no other can own.
The tears in my eyes I can wipe away.
But the memories of you will always stay.

The shell must break before the bird can fly. -Lord Alfred Tennyson

The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. -Charles Dubois

Life is so constructed that an event does not, cannot, will not, match the expectation.-Charlotte Bronte

The best love affairs are those we never had.-Norman Lindsay

The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.-Harriet Beecher Stowe

How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love? -Albert Einstein

A hundredth of a second here, a hundredth of a second there -- even if you put them end to end, they still only add up to one, two, perhaps three seconds, snatched from eternity. -Robert Doisneau on photography

The hardest thing is loving someone and having the courage to let them love you back. -Dermot Mulroney, Wedding Date

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it. -Michel de Montaigne

Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. -Christopher Robin to Pooh

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart. -Elizabeth Foley

Are you upset little friend? Have you been lying awake worrying? Well, don't worry...I'm here. The flood waters will recede, the famine will end, the sun will shine tomorrow, and I will always be here to take care of you. -Charlie Brown to Snoopy
- “If I had my life to love over again, I’d do it all the same.”

A man is not old until his regrets take the place of his dreams.

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I ended up where I intended to be. -Douglas Adams

Be the change you want to see in the world. -Mahatma Gandhi

The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating - in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, form the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit it to remove your head as the barrier to your life. -Anne Morriss

Happiness is essentially a state of going somewhere wholeheartedly, one-directionally, without regret or reservation. -W. H. Sheldon

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